True Ease in Writing comes from Art, not Chance, As those move easiest who have learned to dance. - Alexander Pope
Yesterday in my psychology class we were talking about groupthink, the tendency of a group to agree on everything, even when individual members of the group think otherwise. This happens because the members of the group don't want to speak up and be seen as being negative, so they go along with the group consensus, even when it is clearly wrong. This got me thinking about the kind of community we Gambians are building online, especially on Facebook.
Facebook of course encourages groupthink, by intent as well as by design. If we agree with something someone says we comment or like it (notice how there is no dislike button), if we disagree we silently scroll past it. Naturally no one wants to be that Facebook person, the one who is always negative - not only does it earn you many enemies, our culture right from birth teaches us the value of keeping our negative thoughts to ourselves in public. And so given our many online friends, everything we say or do, no matter how banal or insensible, gets liked and admired to oblivion. We hear what we want to hear, always, a continuous stream of yeses that flows past us as we stand still in stagnation, each one reinforcing our feelings of being right. Our world view is never challenged, we grow fat on self-congratulation, and we are the poorer for it.
The fact is that dissent is healthy. "No" is a word like a protective wall for our thoughts, that we come up against and stop for a minute, to rethink our opinions and our beliefs. No one is always right - there are always things we do not know about, or have formed incorrect opinions on. To quote Anonymous, "Show me a man who is always right and I'll show you a pompous fool".
It would be OK if all that was at stake was profile pictures and saccharine status updates. Who cares what happens on facebook, after all, with its "here today, gone tomorrow" nature. But the effects of this perpetual patting each other on the back are far more harmful. In the past few years I have come into contact with many different Gambian youth, from all walks of life, multi-talented and each containing great promise. And as I have interacted with each of them my hope for the future of Gambia has grown - I truly believe that together, hands joined, we can finally make Gambia into the country we want it to be, prosperous and proud among nations, despite her size. And Facebook - and websites like balafong - are at last letting us all come together and consolidate our resources, in ways that were impossible previously. But these technologies - like any technologies - are just tools, and we must be prudent in the way we use them, and guard against bad habits.
One of the things that pains me most about the older generation, the one before us, is how useful political discourse has become almost an impossibility for them. The very word "politics" has become dirty, sullied over many years of misuse - people become mortal enemies at election time with those who do not support the party they do; ad hominem attacks are the accepted standard. This is a sad fact. We have avoided this so far in our own attempt by trying to steer clear of politics as much as possible. But the canker that eats through our political system and corrupts it is not limited in its effect by apathy - it can spread through any system of discourse, if not guarded against. It is a worm that can come into existence wherever we meet to speak with each other, and it spreads, when we refuse to listen to each others' opinions, it spreads when we get the notion in our minds that we are always right, that those who disagree with us hate us, that a difference in opinion amounts to a personal affront, that defending our opinion - even when it is clearly wrong - is a matter of honor and a fight to the death.
And so we must protect against this worm. We must start now, on Facebook and on balafong and wherever else we congregate. We must give each other the permission to criticize and to point out what we think is wrong, and we must not take it personally. "Oh that's OK", some people will say, "I am fine with criticism as long as it is constructive". "Constructive Criticism" has become a meaningless phrase - what we mean when we say it is "yes, you may criticize me, as long as you mostly agree with what I say and only disagree with a few outlying points". This is not the way it is to be done. Oh, yes, respect is necessary and all that - we must not insult each other. But real criticism - true criticism - stings sometimes, and we must not turn away from it. And even more important, we must not take it personally - being wrong is not a demotion of yourself in any way. On the contrary it is a testament to your maturity to be wrong and admit it, even in public. There is only one entity who is always right, and He is not a part of our discourse - we humans make mistakes: how else could we grow, and learn, and become better versions of ourselves? So we must grit our teeth, and ignore the voice in our heads going "kee daf la buga yap sah - daf la yaaga ute ndah nak - yaa kore baaye sah", we must shut it out and listen carefully to what the other person is saying, and think carefully on it, even if we disagree with them. Especially if we disagree with them. Only then can we move from mere trivial conversations into a space where our words have meaning, and can engender something greater.
I feel if we do this we will be building a stable and sure foundation, upon which will rest the great country we are about to create, and we will become a better people for it, able to argue fiercely over our opinions in the morning, then sit around the attaya maker in the evening and drink and joke around and laugh, the best of friends. Imagine what we will be able to achieve then.
Just one person's opinion - please do feel free to disagree and criticize in the comments. :)